Who do you say that I am?

Who is God? Who is Jesus? And what is the whole idea about the holy spirit?

Three fantastic questions, and some of which I believe at some point in life we all come across. A lot of the time we humans come to this place of questioning when we are in the pit of despair. Depression, anxiety, mental breakdowns, facing death. When fear abounds people without realising ask God where he is, God help me, in hope that by some miracle he is real. As no one wants to die. Now I can't speak on behalf of everyone but I can without fear striking me down proclaim with great joy what I have experienced throughout my life. You see my main passion in life is Jesus, it's what interests me most. Not because I have too but because I love Jesus.

Who is God? Well no one has ever seen God and ever lived to tell the tale. The bible says in Exodus 33:20... But, he said, “you cannot see my face, for man shall not see me and live.” which in thinking is totally weird yet completely understandable if that makes any sense. Weird because why would God not make himself known if he wants people to glorify and praise him. But totally understandable because God didn't want people to forcibly worship him, he gave free will so we would have a choice to be in relationship and praise his name. Kind of like finding someone to marry or making friends, We don't just settle for someone that isn't making us happy and/or making us feel like we are special. No, we want to be around people that accept us for who we are, not for what we can give them/what they can get out of it. True love and friendship is someone who accepts us no matter what; even if we only have the clothes on our back. That is how I see a relationship with God. We aren't robots. He longs for us to earnestly seek him and want him in our lives. I personally couldn't imagine my life without him. When I look back on my life I can see all the times he has intervened in my life and helped me out, saved me, and loved me.
Isaiah 41:10.. Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Who is Jesus? A lot of people have a hard time with even the thought of a man called Jesus. Which is completely understandable because at the time it is recorded he walked this planet. None of us were alive. Yet we are to believe he is the messiah. That is a whole different level to what we are used to. I mean, it can be hard to believe stuff we do see... let alone someone we don't. Now me personally, I love Jesus, I wouldn't want my life to be without him. He is my refuge, he is my strength, he is my saviour and king. I remember as a child, hearing about God, Jesus and all that but never fully understanding. You see I was brought up in a Christian household. But I didn't believe until I went to a youth camp in 2003. And no lie... it was like a light build moment within me. The very last bible study we had in our dorm room, and I was hooked. But I had no idea what to do next, until I started the Elim Pentecostal church in Knottingley. The pastor at the time took me seriously and helped me grow in my faith.

There is not a bone in me that doubts in Jesus. He has made himself so real in my life. From standing in front of me (so I can see him that is) to speaking, to touching me, to protecting me, and so on. I remember as a teenager, just lying in my bed and just felt what felt like arms just wrapping around me and hugging me. A beautiful moment. Someone once asked me, how do you know it was him when you saw him? Really good question. To which the only answer I have is, you just do. I can't prove it. Like going on Google to find the evidence to prove a point. No, when ever he stood infront me, I just knew. It goes beyond your mind, it's your spirit that just knew. One time while praying, God gave me a vision. In this vision I saw Jesus on his horse (He and the horse shone like this sun) in Jesus's hand were chains, that were attached to a jail cell that was wrapped around the person I was praying for. Though it was a vision, it was like I was there in the presence of Jesus in this vision I was seeing. So much so that I physically could not stand up, I  was drawn to my knees. Philippians 2:10-11...that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.
Such a powerful experience. I find that in the presence of Jesus/God during worship I can't just stand still, I either dance or I am drawn to my knees.

What is the whole idea about the holy spirit? Many Christians are confused about matters concerning the holy spirit. Some are afraid and they would rather think of it as a load of rubbish. I on the other hand thank God for sending to holy spirit to be with us every step of the way in our lives.

The Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you everything and make you remember all that I have told you. (John 14:26)

The holy spirit gives us spiritual gifts and the boldness to fulfil these gifts to those God sends our way. He guides, he speaks into our conscience to convict when we have done something wrong. Gently correcting us. He reveals the hidden treasures of the bible, treasures of heaven and of earth as and when God permits it. He gives us power and boldness to take that step of faith to do the next step in God's will that we are to take. The way I see it is for Jesus to fulfil his purpose on earth which was to die for all sins and break the bonds of sin so we can be forgiven and have a relationship with God, like God previously designed before the first act of rebellion in the garden of Eden. He had to leave to keep the walk by faith believe by faith way of life. Like I said previously God wanted us to choose to believe, and if Jesus had stuck around and everyone can to see it for themselves, that he had truly resurrected from the dead. People would automatically believed. Faith would not necessarily be needed because as the saying goes the proof is in the pudding. So the spirit of God, as we know it as the holy spirit came so we can have New life in Christ.

A moment that comes to mind about living by faith and guidance of the holy spirit would be when we moved down to Cambridge. We were told it is impossible to get a house in the village where my husband works. And behold it was proving so. The only string of hope I had to hold on too, was the incredible peace God gave me while we were having a tour around the local school. I had never felt peace like it before. So I knew without a shadow of doubt my oldest was going to this school. Even when all the odds were against me, I had to stand on what I believe was being said to me through the peace. And right at the last minute, I mean a week or so before it was time for us to leave, my husband's child protection certificate came through and immediately God said to him go online and there was the house, what was to be our house for 2 years. Hallelujah. Faith isn't easy but the holy spirit helps us.

Right!! Let's flip the topic onto ourselves.

Who do I say that I am? 
(I meaning you. A question of yourself)
Now this is a topic I've struggled with, as do a lot of people around the world. Why? There could be a million reason. From how we were made to feel growing up, to what the society tells us is beautiful. Anyway, God.... for a lot of my life, specifically the last 10year has been trying to get me to accept myself just like Ephesians 2:10 says 'a masterpiece'. It is so easy to proclaim a loud I am a masterpiece, I am beautiful in the eyes of God. I am fearfully and wonderfully made psalm 139:14. I am a child of God. That's all easier said than done. But why do I find it hard to accept and believe it. I can believe he loves me, and protects me and provides for me. I can believe without a doubt that Jesus is real. But I can't see myself as his masterpiece. I don't mean in a vain way, oh look at me oh look at me. No no. I mean, to truly not care about if people will reject me, because I'm not beautiful enough or talented enough or clever enough. When I look in the mirror I see two big black eyes. To which no amount of makeup will cover. I used to wear make up to cover what I saw as flaws up. It wasnt til God used my ex boyfriend to ask me to take my make up off. And when I did, he said don't wear it again you don't need too. Since then I stopped. I thank God for that moment, because it was the beginning of a journey to accepting who I am, who God made me to be.

You see recently I was going about my own business and God just put my whole mind on pause with one question. Why don't you accept who you are. So I looked in the mirror, and looked at my face, and thought yes why don't I. I'm good enough for God, whose opinion do I need, his opinion is the only one that truly matters. He will never reject me. So I'm on the journey of embracing my face, so when a photo is taken I can not worry about how dark my eyes are or if I look dodgy or not pretty. My husband gets frustrated with me, he says 'your beautiful stop worrying, I wouldn't let you out of the house if you didn't look nice.' I know I have to stop believing lies and start embracing who God made me to be.

Let's pray.
Father, embracing who we are in this modern day society can not always be  easy for people. Father soften our/my heart towards myself and others so that I may see how you see me and how you see others. Help me to embrace this body you have given me and live my life in abundance. Forgive me for any time I have mocked your creation, forgive me for not loving who I am. Help me to not only say I'm a masterpiece but to live it out and to encourage those around me that they to are a masterpiece. In Jesus name amen

Be blessed